There are many ads I hate, but some of the companies responsible are less than obliging when it comes to posting them on YouTube. The fact that I’ve found both the “I’ve made the right choice” McDonald’s ad and this Hungry Jack’s one on the web leads me to suspect that the respective companies are proud of their hideous campaigns.
This is not offensive in the same way as the Maccas ad (or its equally horrid “sequel”); it’s merely annoying. It seems that HJ’s are (is? I really can’t figure it out – what is the apostrophe in the name for, anyway?) trying to dress their junk fare up as “fresh”, but it falls flat. For a start, the bloke has to inspect his burger closely to identify the ingredients – I’d rather that, having tasted it, he’d be able to do that automatically. Then, when he tells the woman that it contains aioli, she breathes “Garlic mayo!” in wonderment, as a way of letting all us dolts in our lounge-rooms know what this exotic ingredient is1.
At least it’s given me another catch-phrase I can use inappropriately. Try it! It’s fun. Just interject a breathless “garlic mayo!” at meetings, in conversations… it’s truly versatile.
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1. It bothered me that the writers were patronising the audience so much, but seeing Matt Moran in the Masterchef Masterclass teaching a handful of Straya’s best amada chefs how to make garlic mayonnaise leads me to conclude that I over-estimate the knowledge of the audience.
The McDonald’s advertising account executives are probably not aiming their commercials at me. I can’t remember the last time I ate McDonalds (possibly because it would have followed an irresponsible amount of drinking) and I can’t imagine ever being drunk enough to do that again (not because I’ve reached a higher plane of maturity, but because I tend to do my irresponsible drinking closer to home, far from the dubious temptations of a quick’n'dirty cheeseburger). There’s really nothing that could entice me to sample their product, so I am not surprised that the latest campaign leaves me cold. What I am surprised by is how confused I am by the ad. Perhaps I have inflated expectations of my levels of insight, but I had expected that McDonalds ads were too stupid for me, not that I was too stupid for them.
After I’d seen it the first time, I was gobsmacked. Stunned by the relentless pandering to the fragile male ego with the (professional, capable, career-woman) wife representing the (gorgeous, debonair, flirtatious) Simon as balding and spreading to her (balding, spreading) husband who smirks in his (misguided) confidence that he is a true prize. In “ad break” viewing, it seems as though the wife is perhaps deliberately bringing up her Simon story as a means of stoking her husband’s ego. She knows that he’s insecure, and that he remembers her dashing teenage suitor, and thinks that this re-telling of the reunion scene will banish the insecurities he’s carried throughout their marriage.
Then I watched it more closely.
Now, when she started on her little tale (“You’ll never guess who I ran into today!”) I think she had every intention of telling it like it was. Then, she registers his tone when he responds snarkily “yeah, I remember Simon from school” (notice the intake of breath, and her changed expression). Up until then, she had no idea of his simmering resentment of Simon, but now it’s clear. She decides – in the interests of protecting his delicate self-esteem – to reimagine the whole scene in a way designed to placate him.
Who is McDonald’s selling to with this? Surely not the “wives”, who might recognise this awful charade and would therefore be unlikely to respond positively to it being shown up in such a harsh light. Surely not the “husbands” who might start to question their wives’ sincerity whenever they are favourably compared with an unarguably handsome man. And it’s not the kids, who are embarrassed – and, quite possibly, terrified – by the revelation that their dad could be a similarly sad, pathetic, deluded little man.
Best possible scenario? The agency is deliberately white-anting Mickey Ds.
If it’s cricket season, it must also be the season of annoying ads repeated at the end of every second over. KFC is usually responsible for the most grating of these, but there’s been enough written and said about their most recent PR debacle1.
No, the ad that’s annoying me most this season is the one for Nintendo DS. You’ve seen it: a gormless youth spends his summer playing with his hand-held game. His mother looks a tad concerned – shouldn’t he be out enjoying his youth instead of shut indoors with an electronic game? – but, whatcha gonna do? He’s a teenager.
And it’s just as well she doesn’t interfere with his obsessive gameplay because in the last scene of the ad we see her, pencil in hand and brow furrowed, trying to nut out a problem with what looks like a supermarket receipt. Son happens along, glances at the receipt and says, immediately, “they’ve overcharged you $20!”. Mother looks fondly at him and realises that the DS maths game he’s been playing has sharpened his mind.
Now, seriously. If a shop overcharges you they don’t record that on the receipt, do they? Or are we to believe that there was a serious glitch in the computer system which rounded up each item on the bill to a total of exactly $20 overcharged, and this boy genius – thanks to his DS brain workouts – was able to mentally tot that up in a couple of seconds?
Anybody who sees this ad, buys the idea that it promotes cognitive clarity and therefore gets one for themselves or their offspring needs to be removed from the gene pool. Otherwise the coming generations are all going to be as smart as Olivia Newton John.
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1. Although I’d love to see the reaction if our American friends caught a glimpse of last year’s ads. You remember them – shots of players in their garish 20-20 getup with “humourous” voiceovers implying that… EVEN ON THE CRICKET FIELD THESE GUYS COULDN’T GET ENOUGH FRIED CHICKEN! That wasn’t the point of the controversy, though, I hear you say. Well, it might have been, if they’d got a look at this:
So, Ricky Ponting’s just assuming that Andrew Symonds wants KFC because he’s black? Or, worse, an American audience might think he’s a white guy done up like an olde timey minstrel. Pass me my smelling salts.
