This week I have been

Reading

The 2011 Tour de France race guide.

Watching

An Idiot Abroad

Listening to

The xx

Discovering

(Or rediscovering) Hamlet - Nicki Greenberg's beautiful new version, thanks to the fabulous Snarkattack, who invited me along to see Nicki talk about the creative process behind the book.

Eating

  • An enormous serve of bangers'n'mash and a nourishing pint of Kilkenny at the Town Hall one dismal Tuesday evening.
  • A "Chachi" - chianina meatball sandwich - another brioche donut and some amazing chocolate tart at Beatrix, which Essjay has reviewed.
  • A lazy Sunday lunch at The Crimean. The Polish hunter's stew (bigos) was just the thing to revive me after a chilly bike ride.
  • Generous piles of fried food with oodles of chillies and sichuan peppercorns at Sichuan House
  • Succulent suckling pig at Liberteene.
  • An array of bright, zesty flavours at Chin Chin, where the only problem was having to choose only some of the items from what looks to be a menu that is all hits, no filler.

Links

Food TV – Good Chef, Bad Chef

MasterChef Australia judge Gary Mehigan and nutritionist Janella Purcell bring their own styles of cooking for a food showdown. Today Gary makes a ricotta pudding and Janella cooks a chunky peasant-style soup.

Look, I’m not really going to go through this in a great deal of detail. I’ve got the Food Channel on in the background to warm me through this bitterly cold day and have been enjoying wacky Ming and the Barefoot Contessa… and now this has come on. Usually I turn it off because it pisses me off no end, but today? I’m sharing with you.

Why does it piss me off so? I don’t like the morality attached to the good/bad dichotomy; that there is food that is inherently “good”, or “bad”. Nor do I like the peculiar smugness with which Janella presents her “superior” food, or the fact that Gary’s sugar-, cream- and fat-laden creations are set in contrast with her freekeh salads and farro soups without the benefit of any narrative of balance, moderation, or even a dash of STFU.

Today’s episode is focussed on the food of Italy, which means that the food of Italy will provide a minor distraction to Janella as she makes fun of Gary’s weight, which she can apparently do because she’s the “good” chef and a woman. He cops it because… he’s been told to? The producers think this nonsense is entertaining?

Janella’s recipe is the first one up today, and she starts with “lots” of extra virgin olive oil. Gary raises a quizzical eyebrow, given that whenever he adds oil to anything she responds with a variation on “piggy piggy pig pig”. She gets away with it, though, because it’s the good oil (and – did I mention? – she’s the good chef).

Gary is cooking octopus and discusses how it takes a long time to cook as it needs to be looked after to remain tender. Or something. I lost track when Janella interrupted this with “just like women!”. Perhaps I’m on edge after reading Bettina Arndt’s ridiculous SMH “opinion piece” on Julia Gillard being a bad role model for Australian women (and then Mia Freeman’s inevitable look-at-Mia response)1 but I am just exhausted by women who use their public profiles to display attitudes that would be decried as obsolete, patronising and offensive if they were held by men.

Okay, I’m turning off. That fake (at least I’m hoping it’s fake) “i’m so dumb!” squeal-giggle shtick that Janella has just demonstrated has done me in. Janella (having been asked to switch on a food processor): “Are you trying to trick me, Gary?” Simper. Gary: “Huh?” Janelle: “You’ve turned the food processor backwards”. Seriously.

Good Chef, Bad Chef is on Lifestyle Food, but I recommend finding something less maddening to do, such as cleaning the grouting.

1. No, I don’t follow Mia on Twitter, but – inexplicably – I follow someone who does and her response was retweeted by them. I feel dirty.

Food TV – The Big Food Fight

Join Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall and Sue Perkins in this quiz show that tests your knowledge of all things gastronomic. Features special guests James Martin and Charlotte Church.

This Channel 4 show made its local debut on Wednesday and follows a tried and tested format: a snarky host, two teams, each with a chef acting as “captain” and a celebrity as their support. Of course, it’s difficult to distinguish between celebrity and chef these days. As the blurb promised, Hugh F-W is the head of one team and James Martin – who I haven’t seen before, but came with the “housewives’ favourite” tag, so is therefore clearly not new to television – headed up the other. Hugh was joined by Charlotte Church (a non-chef celebrity) whilst James had Ching-He Huang (mysteriously missing from the guide summary) who was introduced as a food writer and TV chef, tipping the scales in the James team’s favour as far as food knowledge was concerned. Hugh’s team had greater international celebrity status, though.

The format of the show – if such can be gleaned from a single viewing – is a series of quizzes and challenges.

Round 1 – ten of a kind

20 seconds to name ten types of a certain food. For Hugh, it was pasta shapes, of which he identified eight, followed by a set-up-for-the-laffs question about pasta puttanesca. James had 20 seconds to name ten types of cooking oil, followed by a question that must have been in the press at that time regarding a man in Zimbabwe substituting something (urine) for oil. Ching-He was asked to identify vegies that are served with a traditional British Sunday lunch and Charlotte had to name ten items from the menu of her local Chinese Restaurant, the Golden Well in Bridge End.

Round 2 – what the fork is it?

Contestants try to work out what an unusual appliance or implement does. In the first round, Hugh tried to figure out the purpose of a bright red octopus-shaped plastic implement, deciding – after much hemming and hawing – that it was a vegetable cutter. No points to his team, as Sue demonstrated that it was designed to be used to turn cooked hot-dogs into… well… octopus-shaped cooked hot-dogs. No doubt Hugh regrets not using the design as a clue to the purpose. Ching-He and James managed to pretend they didn’t know what their implement was long enough for Sue to make a few vibrator jokes.

Round 3 – skills challenge

The team captains (right handers) had to prepare a hamburger with their left hand. Right hands were tied to their partners’ left hands, and partners were allowed to contribute a right hand. High concept, clearly designed for maximum mess and potential for injury.

Round 4 – palate test

A dish was blended up and served to the teams to identify. Hugh and Charlotte managed to identify their Tricolore Salad fairly easily, but James and his team-mate struggled a bit with their KFC Zinger Burger. James started off with “hot and spicy” and followed up with “bloody awful”. He managed to identify it with a few hints and was outed as a fan of the dirty bird. Hugh snuck in a quick comment about the unhappy lives of the Colonel’s birds before the round ended.

Final round – buzzer questions

Peremptory trivia question round (won, in this instance, but Hugh and Charlotte).

The winner is announced and the credits roll.

This is a fluffy show which would probably serve as reasonable background TV for a task like doing dishes or preparing dinner. It’s not a how-to food show, imparting practical advice; it’s a trivia competition designed for maximum double entendre. Worth a look.

Lifestyle Food, 9.00pm, Wednesdays

Simply Baking – simply vanished!

I am disconsolate.

It appears that Simply Baking has ended.  I have been so looking forward to settling down for my dose of the Nutter magic.  So much so that I couldn’t quite believe it when I went through my recordings and couldn’t see it.  Naturally, I blamed its disappearance on the other occupant of the house with opposable thumbs, which was not as satisfying as usual given that he’s away.

Eventually I accepted that I’d have to survive a Nutterless week, and scrolled through the program guide to reschedule the recording. The slot that had held Simply Baking is now home to Coastal Kitchen and I will never see the Sandman flame shirt again.

Sob.

Simply Baking – delayed gratification

Occasionally I have things to do on Fridays.  I know!  Crazy, isn’t it?

Anyway, I have entrusted today’s Simply Baking to the IQ, so will have it safely recorded for when I get home.  Of course, I doubt that I will do the Nutter justice if I were to watch and blog after Friday drinks, so I will get the post up as soon as I can tomorrow.

Food TV – Matthew Hayden’s Home Ground

Foundations: Australian cricket legend Matthew Hayden is on a quest to achieve a more self-sufficient, sustainable and enriched lifestyle for his family.

Now that bodes ill. There’s nothing at all objectionable in the synopsis; in fact, it seems laudable. What will I do if Mr Hayden is not obnoxious? How will I cope if I have to change my opinion of him?

The show opens with a greeting from the man himself, who reassures us that this quest is only going to take six weeks. There will be guests, including the local producers who inspire him, and – if the previews are anything to go by – Andrew Symonds. Oh dear. I hope he’s in a later episode, as I didn’t sign up for Haydos and Roy.

After the credits, a montage of Haydos’ performances backed by the dulcet tones of Nine’s commentary team reminds us why we should give a rats about this particular personal journey. After explaining that part of the reason for this endeavour is an attempt to “relive [his] own childhood [and] hone in on the simple things in life”, Haydos is off to the chicken coop to collect eggs, commentating the process as though the hens are consciously involved in a sporting endeavour. I guess he’s got to have a selling point and the cricketing is the selling point, but if it continues it will be too much for this viewer to bear.

This is the first episode, which might account for the overdose in introduction: wife, kids, landscape designer, mum, dad and brother. This is where I discover that I can blame Kellie Hayden for the series of cookbooks.

Where’s the food? Find out, after the jump.

Continue reading Food TV – Matthew Hayden’s Home Ground

Simply Baking – three teabreads

Doesn’t time fly when you have a Nutter to look forward to every Friday? Well, it does for me, and my excitement was only slightly diminished to see that today’s episode will be all about teabreads, since really, it will be all about the Nutter (and, hopefully, the flaming shirt). Perhaps a Nutter twist will help take teabreads from pedestrian to orgasmic?

Nutter’s shirt today has no flames, unfortunately (if you are still reading, Dawn, it’s the lemon shirt that launched your creation all those weeks ago!). We start with a brief introduction to the concept of teabreads (which, I suspect, are what we might know of as “tea cakes”). We will be getting three recipes today: two sweet, one savoury, and unfortunately ALL healthy. Of course, my interest is piqued by the concept of the “millennium” version, which will apparently contain “all those delicious new flavours that are coming around at the moment”. What will they be? I’m unsuccessfully casting my mind back ten years to try to identify the flavour revolution, so am very keen on what we’ll see.

The recipes, after the jump…

Continue reading Simply Baking – three teabreads

Simply Baking – souffles (with that Nutter twist)

Today is souffle day, and not – as indicated by the Foxtel guide – omelette day. This is a great relief to me, not because I don’t adore omelettes (I am human, after all), but because I was struggling to understand how – even with a Nutter twist – an omelette could fall under the heading “baking”. Now I need worry no more! It’s souffle (with a Nutter twist). Two, in fact: one sweet and one savoury.

It is an orange shirt day again today, which I believe bodes well. The reason I say this is that we’ve now seen the orange shirt three times, if my memory is correct, so a revival of the flames can’t be too far away.

We’re starting with the savoury: the classic cheese souffle. Don’t be put off by the reputation of cheese souffle as a difficult dish – the Nutter tips’n'tricks will help us through!

The recipes, after the jump.

Continue reading Simply Baking – souffles (with that Nutter twist)

Food TV – Coconut Coast

It’s “Kitchen Time” on 7Two! And today, we’re joining Reza Mahammad on the Coconut Coast. Reza, strangely enough in this day and age, doesn’t seem to have a Wikipedia page – I know! – but the Good Food Channel and Performing Artistes have short bios. My favourite quotes from each:

The Observer Food Monthly described meeting Reza as “like being ambushed by a cross between Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen and Freddie Mercury”.

Good Food Channel

Okay, so I had to Google Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen1, but even before I knew who he was I liked the description.

And from Performing Artistes:

He inherited a piece of 1950′s London, flock wallpaper and all, and set about inflicting his own brand of artistic flourish. Voila; from flock to Baroque! But with his inimitable concentration span of approximately five minutes, another revamp promptly followed. This time a cross between a Zeffirelli production and the Sistine Chapel.

Intrigued? Read more, after the jump.
Continue reading Food TV – Coconut Coast

Food TV – Delish

There are so many food shows on TV these days. How many of them offer something new or different? If Delia has already shown us how to roast a chook, do we really need to see Nigella doing it, too? And Jamie? And how many times can we watch pizza-making before it becomes aversion therapy?

Over the next few weeks, I’m going to try to add a post-a-week on a food show. New shows will take priority, but there are only so many launches in a year, so there will be recaps and round-ups of some stayers, and some that are quite possibly new only to me. I’ll also keep writing up the Nutter magic on Fridays for as long as channel 7Two continues to show it.

To kick off I’m taking a look at the show that debuted on 7Two the Friday before last: Delish. There’s been a bit of build-up to it, largely over the participation of last year’s MasterChef contestant, Julia Jenkins, so let’s see what it’s like, shall we?

Continue reading Food TV – Delish

Simply Baking – Mamma Mia!

Andrew Nutter welcomes us to his kitchen with an eye-bleedingly red shirt. He’s certainly not one for blending into the background, although this top is uncomfortably close in hue to the shelves to his right. I wonder what baked delights he has in store for us today?

He doesn’t keep us guessing. We’re making pizzas today, and one will be a sweet one. The other will be… Peking duck with plum sauce? Let’s start with the, ahem, savoury one then, shall we?

The recipes, after the jump…

Continue reading Simply Baking – Mamma Mia!

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